18, the name's Claire.
i am a proud danosaur, philion, whovian, sherlockian, potterhead, and all round cool chick :p who am i kidding...
im a muso from the great land of Oz. so i spend my days hiding from kangaroos and sports people... :p or whatever.
should i finish this? i reckon it is going on a bit. i might just leave it here. or maybe here.... :p anywho, carry on. :)
Amazingly, not The Onion:
“[W]e now have young men telling Bloomberg News that they basically view their female peers as rape bombs just waiting to explode and ruin their lives.”
I REPEAT: THIS IS NOT THE ONION
I wish I could say I can’t believe men would say such dumb shit.
Literally, go fuck yourselves. Bye.
This is the DNA of a self-identified homosexual person viewed under 10000x microscopic magnification. If you look closely you can see the DNA has unique characteristics, which supports the theory that there is a biological basis for homosexuality.
They can leap 36 feet
As in leap forward 36 feet
They don’t jump 36 feet into the fucking sky do you know how terrifying that would be the human race wouldn’t have survived because we’d have all had heart attacks while still in Africa
still one of my favorite posts on tumblr
There should be a show called “You’ll Never Find Out” where each week there’s a new story with a new set of characters and it always ends on a cliffhanger.
Well hello there satan
NO BUT THEN IN THE SEASON FINALE THEY HAVE LIKE 3 MINUTE SPOTS TO SHOW THE CONCLUSIONS FOR ALL THE STORIES
AND PLOT TWIST: All those unconnected stories? They connect like puzzle pieces in the end.
I would watch the fuck out of that.
i read that as lions
remember who you are
the vma’s should’ve pulled a brits and made up an award for 1d to win
Once I was walking home with some law school friends and they were like ”Why are you walking up that street your street is like three more streets up”
"Yeah but there’s a house on this street and sometimes their golden retriever naps in the sun on the sidewalk and I like to give him belly rubs"
Now all the law students walk up belly rub lane because law school is stressful and dogs rock
I bet that is the happiest dog
belly rub lane
"I’ll be leaving this sign up until it becomes a social norm"
Okay so this just happened on my dashboard and I personally think this is exactly his kind of humour
Today I went to Subway.
There were these 12 year old boys hanging around. As I got my food and left they were all checking me out like little prepubescent lemurs and one of them said “Can I get your number?” And I turned around and said “Why, you need a babysitter?”
FUCK I FORGOT THAT THE BIRD STORE I WORK AT HAS ONE BABY BIRD THAT LIKES TO SLEEP IN PEOPLES POCKETS IM HOME AND SOMETHING IS MOVING IN MY POCKET OH FUCK
YEAH ITS THE BIRD I JUST ACCIDENTALLY STOLE A BIRD
MY BOSS JUST GAVE ME THE MOST STERN LOOK OF DISAPPROVAL BEFORE HE STARTED LAUGHING SO HARD HE HAD TO GRAB THE EDGE OF A TABLE